Leaving Religion
and
Returning to Religion
Returning to religion (HozRim BeTeshuva) and leaving religion (Yotzim Beshe'ela), are two opposing social phenomena that take place within Jewish society—a multicultural society with many sectors and sub-sectors, and all of them have only one common denominator: their affiliation with the Jewish people.
HazaRa BeTeshuva (Returnees to Religion )
Hozrim BeTeshuva are people who were raised and educated in a secular environment and decided to change their lifestyle and adopt a Jewish religious way of life.
This could stem from a sincere conviction of the need for change, it could happen due to an event they experienced, a psychological state, or for other reasons that led them to believe in the righteousness of the religious path—they disconnect themselves from their close and familiar environment, embark on a grueling path of changing thought and action, and land in a framework that seems most suitable to them.
The transformation in their lives unfolds before the eyes of family members, close friends, and work colleagues.
This is a process that develops and lasts for many months, in stages: After making the decision among themselves, they begin to drop hints to their close circle—the male Ba'al Teshuva puts on a kippah, then a tzitzit, then grows a beard and adopts the external dress style of the religious sector he chose to join. In the meantime, he is seen more and more in a synagogue, does not answer phones on Shabbat, dedicates many hours to listening to lectures on religious topics, and connects with the rabbi and community to which he chose to belong. Sometimes he disconnects completely from the environment that knew him and is absorbed into a new environment, sometimes he will continue to live in his existing apartment and work at his workplace—just with a different conduct than before.
The female Ba'alat Teshuva will undergo a similar process, with the external change expressed in modest dress. Instead of pants and revealing shirts, she will wear dresses and shirts with long sleeves. If she is married, she will wear a head covering.
The process of Teshuva often shakes the personal connections between the returnees and their secular environment, sometimes leading to a complete disconnect from family and close friends.
The depth of the distance or the break is determined by the returnees themselves.
Usually, family members and friends will respect their decision and make it easier for them to continue the relationship, but in many cases, the returnees tend to adhere to a rigid value system that does not allow them to build a bridge.
For example: due to strict adherence to Kosher food laws, they will not eat or drink from the utensils of secular people, even if they are their parents. Due to the values of modesty, they cannot be in close contact with women, even female relatives. Because of Shabbat observance, they will not be able to go on shared vacations with friends. And other religious restrictions, as they chose to adopt.
The choice of male and female returnees to adhere to an ultra-Orthodox (Haredi) lifestyle does not give them an immediate entry ticket to ultra-Orthodox society. They are received with a distant hug. In the existing Haredi (ultra-Orthodox) sector, they are considered "second-class" because they were not born into an Haredi family—they marry among themselves because their sons and daughters are not considered a "proper match," and in educational institutions and the synagogue, they carry the label of "Ba'alei Teshuva" and will undergo an unpleasant selection.
Therefore, they will prefer to be among male and female returnees like them.
Only their third or fourth generation will be able to remove the label and become an integral part of ultra-Orthodox society.
The extent of the phenomenon is not precisely known, but estimates speak of several hundred thousand Israelis. They come from all strata of secular society, and from all classes and professions—it can be a kibbutz member or an urbanite, a fighter pilot or a bank clerk, a partying bachelor or an outstanding high school student. It happens to them in their adolescence, after they get married, when they are parents of children. Suddenly, in the middle of their lives or when they retire, they discover the new path, the one that will do their soul good.
This is one of the most recognized phenomena in Israeli society, and since the 1970s it has received extensive coverage in the media, in culture, and in art. Especially after it became clear that among the male and female returnees there are many cultural heroes from all fields.
Here is a mythological song by the singer Arik Einstein, lamenting his good friend Uri Zohar, who became a Ba'al Teshuva:
Arik Einstein sings the song
"He Returned to religious."
To watch on YouTube, click on the image.
Yotzim BiSh'elah (Those Who Leave Religion )
Yotzim BiSh'elah are religious people who have decided to change their lives and adopt a secular lifestyle.
They stop observing religious commandments and completely change their external appearance—men will remove their kippah from their head and all the other unique clothing of the sector they belonged to. Women will wear clothing that is not considered modest according to religious standards—pants, short skirts, a shirt with straps.
Leaving religion is a dramatic step in a person's life.
Because of the rigid framework in which they grew up and were educated, the reactions they face from their close environment are harsh and painful, sometimes to the point of a complete ostracism and a break in contact from family members and friends—many in their close circle will see them as a "heretic" with whom it is forbidden to be in contact.
Therefore, the process of leaving religion is faster and sharper, without visible stages. The "Yotzim" simply disappear from the environment in which they grew up and were educated and are absorbed into society like any secular person.
The extent of the phenomenon is not precisely known, but estimates speak of several hundred thousand—those who come from the ultra-Orthodox stream or from the national-religious stream. They do not receive extensive media coverage like the Ba'alei Teshuva, and are not eager to be exposed.
In general, the drift from religion to secularism does not receive applause in the secular public, not even raised eyebrows. They are received there without unnecessary questions as if it were the most natural thing—a farewell to rigid religious commitments and a transition to an open and liberal world.
For those who leave from the national-religious sector, which is more moderate, the transition is simpler because they came from an environment that was involved in Israeli life—they acquired a general education, they are familiar with Israeli slang, and the unique concepts of Israeli-ness. With this "package" they can easily integrate into the new world, both in studies and at work.
In contrast, young people from the ultra-Orthodox sector are forced to adapt to a new and foreign reality for them.
The ultra-Orthodox did not grow up in Israeli life—they acquired only Torah education; they have no basic knowledge of math, English, and other subjects that exist in core curricula. Therefore, they are required to catch up on their education in order to find suitable employment. In addition, the turnaround they made in their lives, for the most part, leaves them without financial support and family backing.
In Israel, there are a number of organizations that assist them. And alongside them are spontaneous organizations of male and female "Yotzim BeSh'elah" communities, which are organized through social networks.
The two social phenomena, Teshuva and Yetzah BiSh'elah, have gained momentum in recent decades, and especially since the 2000s.
Both are present in Israeli discourse, in politics and in the economy, in education and in culture.
Both express the constant tension that exists in Jewish society, the internal restlessness that accompanies Jews in Israel and around the world and causes them to move and wander from place to place, the constant search for "the grass that looks greener" somewhere else, in a different framework.
For more on Hozrim BeTeshuva
For more on Yotzim BiSh'elah
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